This is for those who stick to the same routine and expect love to fall into their laps…
Ok, ok – I know you are sick of New Year’s motivational lingo, but this is a perfect time for me to stress something that I tell both clients and friends. Basically, if what you’re doing right now isn’t working, you have the opportunity to start fresh and make a change for something to happen in 2014. If you really think about it, finding someone special is within your reach, but it won’t happen easily. Sure, sometimes it’s luck for those very few people, but for the rest of us, it takes time and understanding the concept of what your potential mate wants. That’s right, if you see what attracts the person who you are attracted to, then you can use that to your advantage. Use these tools to better yourself and make yourself “more dateable” to your target audience.
Be observant. Years ago, when I was dating, I spent a lot of time checking out what other women were wearing (the girls who were getting all the attention from guys I was attracted to). They were wearing heels, I wasn’t. They were wearing clothes that flatter their figure, while I was wearing clothes that were trendy and stylish, but may not have necessarily been anything a guy was interested in. I was dressing for my friends, since they cared more about style. I was also interested in certain expensive handbags. However, I came to find out that a simple, small clutch from a thrift store was just as perfect and complimented my flirty, flattering outfit! The women that guys were approaching at bars were smiling and outgoing, and not intimidating. The right flattering look and outgoing attitude is everything.
The men and women you’re attracted to – who are THEY attracted to? Who is your “competition?” Check it out for yourself. Google images of women and men at nice bars or lounges and what they’re wearing and if they seem like they’re having fun or if they’re just standing around with their drink, waiting for someone to come up to them. (Not attractive). Or next time you’re out, see who is getting the most attention. This is what clients ask me to help them with, whether it is for their online profile or just to go to an event. Observe! This will help you get your end goal!
Heal yourself. Of course, you also have to be happy with yourself first! You’ve heard it a million times, but you have to be happy with your looks and your inner beauty. People can smell someone who is not confident, and it’s not attractive. Research has linked almost any type of exercise to greater body confidence. Would you be attracted to a guy or girl who is not healthy or keeping up appearances?
You may be a happy person, but out of shape, or you may be perfectly in shape, but not happy on the inside because of an unresolved issue. Don’t allow yourself to be hurt by someone who will treat you badly because you are treating yourself badly. You know what to do; get help/get a hobby/get a workout buddy if you need it. I can’t stress enough how much it is projected to others when you’re happy with you. Then, after you are confident and radiant from inside and out, you will be ready to bring someone who is also healthy, into your life.
If you’re consistently not meeting people, then something has to change. Try the above-mentioned tips before complaining about never getting approached or not finding love. They call for a good amount of effort, but like anything that you want in life, it will be worth it in the end!
The WingWoman Blog 